There was an episode of South Park on a while ago where Stan’s dad was on Wheel of Fortune and in the final round the clue was “people who annoy you” or something like that, and after he picked out his letters the board said “n_ggers”, and he blurted out a racial slur, but it turned out to be “naggers”. At school Stan apologized to Token, who kept telling Stan that he doesn’t get it, but Stan insisted he understood what was wrong. By the end of the episode, Stan finally understood that he really didn’t get it and that he never would, which is what Token was trying to get across. Yeah, Stan would never get it, and no one expected him to, but he needed to get that he didn’t get it.

My roommate constantly expresses how she doesn’t understand why people would do certain things. The latest example was when I was talking about how silly high school love is, and she said a kid in her high school killed himself after he was dumped. She didn’t understand why anyone would do that because she would never do that. I pointed out to her that she is the most mentally stable person in the house, so yeah, she couldn’t possibly understand what is going through other people’s heads who aren’t so stable. She understood that and agreed.

It’s important for people to understand that they can’t possibly fully understand what it’s like to be another person ever. We can empathize on some level of course, but to think you know what a person is going through or how a person feels is just arrogant. Just accept that you don’t get it. It’s a step in the right direction to really understanding.